Motherhood & Recovery
Posted on February 19, 2018
Miles walked. Calories consumed. Calories burned. My mind attached itself to numbers - calculating, obsessing and planning all day long - for far too long.
From a young age I always believed I was put on this earth to be a mom. The dream I held in my heart for motherhood was what led to my decision to call The Renfrew Center and catapulted me into a strong recovery. I am thankful for the time spent immersing myself in the process of reclaiming my life and working to unearth the confidence needed to live the life I felt was meant for me.
On a rainy, fall morning in 2013, my world and perspective greatly shifted as my beautiful baby girl was born. Two and a half years later, I gave birth to the sweetest baby boy who fills my life with trucks, cars and kisses. With both pregnancies, I filled with pride as my body bloomed with life. Watching the rising number on the scale was a wonderful reminder that my babies were growing. After they were born, I was in awe as the milk my body created nourished their bodies and allowed them to thrive.
My recovery needed to be re-defined as I walked into the world of motherhood. Balancing motherhood and recovery is a topic I have heard little about. While I do not have all the answers, what I do know is my recovery allows me to soak in the sweet moments, breathe through the tough ones and trust that my experiences have molded me to be the mom my children need. Leading by example, I am teaching my children the value of self-care, the importance of honoring their needs and that their voices have worth. My husband and I work hard to ensure our children, at young ages, learn to understand, identify and express emotions. The love I hold for my children is one I have never known and while that love makes me incredibly vulnerable, it also makes me bravely strong.
That very love and strength fuel my recovery.