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Recovery blog

Tapping into our Internal Awesome

By: Lara Pence

Posted on April 18, 2016

As a society, we spend a considerable amount of time, energy and money on things that others tell us will make our life 'better'. Self-help books, gym memberships, workshops designed to enlighten, 'clean' cookbooks, trendy new clothes, even bracelets that claim to balance out our energy. It seems that we are constantly sent the message that we need something else to make ourselves happier and more fulfilled. Rarely are we encouraged to look inside of ourselves, bring forth what we already have, and cultivate what lies within to move us towards greater joy. How sad, really, because we actually are already equipped with what we need in order to be fulfilled. We just have to find it, tap into it, and learn how to utilize it.

Finding your internal awesome can certainly be a journey. Most likely your eating disorder (and perhaps other destructive behaviors) has done an excellent job at not only hiding your internal awesome but frankly telling you that it does not exist. You've probably listened to your eating disorder's lies for years, perhaps even decades. So you undoubtedly believe that there is no internal awesome, that you are one of those special ones that is missing this piece. Sorry to break it to you, but you're wrong. We all have an internal awesome, a part of ourselves that is so special and unique that it sets the stage and provides grounding for us to develop greater self-esteem and self-love.

But how do you find it? As you navigate this journey of recovery how do you uncover this internal awesome so that you can feel better, live better, and cultivate joy? Here are some tips to help:
  • Write down all the things that you really love doing and try and find a theme that exists between them. For example, are most of the things on your list about helping others? Connecting with nature? Being artistic? Once you've found a theme you can begin to recognize that part of your awesomeness may be rooted in these things that make you happy.
  • Remember that even though others may like the same things as you, what you bring to the table can still be very different and unique. There is always room for the things that make you special.
  • Ask your support system for help! There's no shame in asking those closest to you, "What do you think makes me special?" And, "Why do you like being with me?" Sometimes we need an outsider's perspective to help us see what is lurking inside.
  • Keep reminders around that help you remember that you are enough! No gym membership, cookbook, bracelet, or book is going to make you enough. You already have it!

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